Doubt Full
John 20:19-31

April 27, 2003

Forget about SARS and put aside Iraq for a while. Quietly, in the week after Easter word was sent back to the Vatican from an archaeological dig about the discovery of another one of those ossuary boxes and the handwriting etched on its cover.

The Vatican officials knew they couldn’t keep the lid on a moment longer, so a brave one rang up the Pope. “Your Holiness, our top people have found an ossuary box with the name of Jesus on it, the bones have been carbon-dated and with a number of other factors, they are absolutely certain that these are the bones of Jesus Christ.” “Are they absolutely certain? That James box was widely criticized as a fraud,” the Pope asked in a shaken voice. “Yes, your Holiness, no doubt.”

Thoughts of the resurrection foundation of the Christian faith and church vanishing flashed through the Pontiff’s brain. “What are we going to do?” The brave official thought for a moment, “Hey, there’s that Protestant, er, Anglican bishop over in the U. S. who never seems to shrink from talking about controversial parts of the faith, John Shelby Spong. Let’s see what he thinks!”

They got hold of Bishop Spong, told him the whole story and asked what they should do. There was a very long pause while Spong pondered all these things in his heart. Finally, “you mean...he really existed?”

If this joke were related to all members of the United Church and indeed to all Canadians, I would hazard that the majority, perhaps an overwhelming majority, would not get the point. They would not think it was a joke, not because they were insulted, but because they would fully agree with Bishop Spong’s fictitious assessment. “You mean, he really did exist?”

Doubt of the most fundamental kind flourishes, the kind of doubt we slap onto Thomas’ shoulders that first post-Easter week. This is part of the good news, for there are many religions and most scriptures which would not admit or permit such doubt. We do admit that we doubt, for we cannot be faithful unless we doubt.

Human nature is limited and so naturally we doubt because you and I cannot know or see or understand everything, especially at one time. Nevertheless, human nature prides itself all too occasionally on always being right - the syndrome most affectionately parodied by Charles Schulz’ Peanuts character Lucy Van Pelt.

When it comes to religious faith, doubt is a sign of weakness, the eternal questions of the nature of life and its meaning and our role and purpose in that meaning, doubt is usually considered heretical and blasphemous. It is rather revealing and ironic that finite human beings can so confidently insist upon knowing precisely what the infinite God chooses not to make directly known.

I must be careful not to make rash generalizations, but the Judeo-Christian scriptures are relatively unique in admitting doubt throughout their pages. At the very least, Christians and Jews are not afraid to show doubt, and it is often doubt that leads the Biblical characters to a full faith.

It happens on both sides of the Biblical page: all the patriarchs - Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph - doubt where they are going and what God wants them to do at one time or another. Peter doubts at the wrong moment, and Thomas’ doubt is immortalized at the right moment.

But what really demonstrates the fearlessness of the Biblical authors and editors is their willingness to include countless incidents of doubt, cowardice, unethical, even murderous behaviour, and total lack of faith in every generation of Israel and God’s people. The disciples are full of doubt and ignorance, despite their great stature in the history of Christianity. This portrayal was not unintentional. Perhaps the Gospel writers rubbed the doubt and ignorance of the disciples in a little bit hard in order to make the point loudly to us readers that it is not our doubt that matters, but how faithfully we then live in the midst of our doubts.

That fictitious tale of finding Jesus’ bones may not have been farfetched for John’s version. The defeated disciples are huddled for safety in a locked upper room, ashen faces full of anxiety and hopelessness. They have heard from Mary Magdalene what had happened, yet there they still cower, wondering, doubting if it is at all true. Does Jesus exist?

Jesus was simply there. “Peace be with you,” more than the common greeting. The Gospels all emphasize that this was a real physical Jesus who stood there as he shows them the wounds in his hands and side. Do they understand resurrection now?



“As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” That’s what the word “apostle” literally means - “one who is sent.” Something has to be done with what you now know and see. Resurrection is never an intellectual fact; it is an experience that compels you to new life.

Thomas had another appointment. He was the one who had sensed what Jesus’ mission was really about when Lazarus had died, and then urged the other disciples, “Let us also go that we may die with him” (John 11:26). Speculation, of course, but perhaps Thomas was not so afraid that night. He was out where it wasn’t safe. So when he heard the others repeat Mary Magdalene’s declaration, “We have seen the Lord,” did he doubt the content of their statement or did he doubt their reliability? Still the dilemma for so many questions today.

One week later they are all, including Thomas, back in the upper room with the door shut again. They may have seen the Lord, they may know that he is risen, but it hasn’t done much for the way they live. They weren’t resurrected yet. They’re still hunkering down, afraid of the religious leaders, and maybe doubting whether Jesus exists after all. Jesus simply stood among them and directed his attention to Thomas. “Feel me. Touch me. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas didn’t need to touch. “My Lord and my God,” he responded.

No one else had said that much. Some of them had said he was a great teacher, someone sent from God, a prophet, a healer, a great man. Compared to the first words of John’s Gospel, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God,” every other description paled. But Thomas, driven by a doubt that would not let him accept a fanciful dream, believed in the technicolour of that soaring poetic prologue. Jesus was more than human.

The church is the last place you should be afraid to doubt, for authentic doubt prods, nudges and shoves you into searching out the truth. There must be doubt until you find the truth. Truth is more than a collection of correct facts. It means participation in the real presence of the God of life. Being faith full is when you live fully in this divine presence. Not only do you know the truth, you act upon it and live it out. Faith is not the opposite of doubt; faith is doubt’s completion. Thanks be for Thomas who did not cut short his doubt so that his faith might be deeper.

Preached by Robert Kitchen
Knox-Metropolitan United Church
Regina, Saskatchewan